Hello Maddy,

We are so sorry to hear about your dad and his cancer diagnosis. Welcome to this very safe space to share what is happening with you and thank you for telling your story.  You are normal in your reaction to your dad’s cancer….it can feel very isolating to have all these emotions and also so much fear.

Your peers and family may also not know how to respond and be helpful to you right now. Many cancer centres have a “psychosocial oncology” department. This means they have social workers, counselors, psychologists and other health care providers dedicated to helping patients and family’s as they cope with a cancer diagnosis and treatment. I am not sure what province you live in, but this psychosocial department should be available to you as well, as a family member impacted by your dad’s cancer. Some cancer centres have groups for children whose parents have cancer, so it is worth asking about as well. To find out if there are some resources available for you at the local cancer centre, you could look on the cancer centre website, or phone the cancer centre and ask about the people and programs they might have for you. The cancer centre may also be able to find another person who is in a similar circumstance to you. Although you are surrounded by your family and supportive people, sometimes it’s nice to find someone your age who also has a parent with cancer and who REALLY “gets it”.

I have found some resources online that you might also find helpful:

1) National Cancer Institute in the United States resource titled “When Your Parent Has Cancer:  A Guide for Teens”: https://www.cancer.gov/publications/patient-education/When-Your-Parent-Has-Cancer.pdf

2) Post by Allyse Shumway “How to Cope With a Parent Who Has Cancer”: https://www.myelomacrowd.org/coping-with-a-parent-who-has-cancer/

3) CanTeen in Australia is a website for teens:  https://www.canteen.org.au/. They have information on their website and also a downloadable booklet called “Dealing with your parent’s cancer: Now what?”, that can be found here:

https://www.canteen.org.au/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Dealing-with-your-parents-cancer.pdf  

I hope others will also respond to you, so that they can share some of their own stories and help you not to feel as alone.

Simone

- CVH Discussion Forum Moderator

Dear Maddy
I have just been back on the forum for a few months and came across your post. I know it is a couple of years but I was struck by your words,  "I am new to this and to me this is a vey scary thing to do as someone who does not reguarly open up."  I have often thought how much courage it must take for people to post on the forum.  I appreciate the courage it took you back then..

I hope the resources Simone shared were helpful and that you had support from family and community.

Take care
Katherine