Hi LNAF

The following is a quote I hold close.....

"And once the storm is over, you won't remember how you made it through,

how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over.

But one thing is certain......

.....when you come out of the storm, you won't be the same person who walked in."

I don't think its a matter of WHEN.

For me, I have made many big changes. I could not explain exactly why....but I knew that I could not remain the same. I was surprised by this and it has definitely been an adjustment with both pros and cons. I understand your use of the word "guilt". I think if I move on.....that means that I have also "left behind". Like you, this is not something I am willing to do. I hear people saying it, and I hear of people doing it.....but im not sure that there is a "line" involved.

I think that a change that rattles you to your core involves a change in "self".....in who your are and in how you live. I think that the "coming to terms", the "acceptance" they speak of is more of learning a new way to live. You adapt, you make allowances and I suppose this is where your sense of peace may come in. Peace with yourself in choosing the changes.

Me, I cannot let go of what I have lost. I am not interested in doing that.....I choose to hang on tight to what little I have left. While I think I am more ...adapting...to this new world...others will say I am not accepting.

These are difficult places to be, and I for one, respect the individual journey. It is dishearteneng to hear.....you need to move on....you need to find peace.

Being brave enough to recognize and accept that you are a changed person though, and you adapt to whats ahead while hanging on to whats behind........here I hope is where one finds a degree of security, by balancing the two worlds.

thinking of you.

continue to write.

WM